On my way home tonight I called Ratchet and asked “can you look online, at that new restaurant up the street, yeah that one, look at the menu online and see if there might be something we can eat? I need this,” I said.
I need this.
Today, I lost my breakfast after my workout. I lost a relationship with someone I love dearly. I lost my temper and my mind. And all of this, I lost before noon.
So far in this decision to change my life and body I have had mostly “win” days. Fewer pounds, HUGE encouragement, support support support on all sides. Today, life just handed me a wallop of whoop ass and at the end of the day my body screamed “feed me!” It wasn’t asking for brown rice and lean turkey. It wanted a big glass of lovely and red, paired with something warm, melty & cheesey, dripping with some sauce or another. Hell, it wanted pie, a gigantic piece of pie.
Ratchet broke the news “No, there is nothing we can have there. Not yet.” Ugh, a crushing blow. I actually felt the “no” in all of my body, it ached, burned.
B R E A T H E and …
I am an emotional eater. Today was made for excuses and “rewards.” It’s the first one I’ve had and I am sure not my last. So I came home, grabbed some white fish, lemon and salad greens and gave thanks for my beloved, for my team of cheerleaders and friends, and for me. Turns out this was a win day. I said no—with help—and I learned that I can do this.