how did we get here?

Rachel, 4 days in.

So a few days ago we threw it out there and told you we were back. So, what happened exactly?

I think it was mid-holidays, we’d had a sugar-y treat nearly every hour around the Christmas clock. I know that we are not alone in this, it’s an international condition around this time of year. Anyway, my pants started feeling slim fit (even though they weren’t) and Ratchet kept asking if we should be making better decisions: less sweets, smaller portions, and how about a burger without a bun?

2 years ago we started down this road, but 6 – 8 months ago we went off-roading, and not in that super fun whooo-hoo sort of way. I made some job changes. I left one I loved, dearly. Grief consumed me, and I consumed pie. A lot of pie, and also, frites.

You know what sucks about weight gain? It just sneaks up on you. Honest to God, we both thought we were doing alright. I mean, not great, we could do better, but doing reasonably well. And maybe we were, by “normal peoples” standards. But lets get real, we’re not “normal” sized gals. (I’ll save expounding on that for a future post)

We were cooking fine for ourselves at home, our white rice is now brown, our milk is almond, we never ever make pasta anymore. We rarely have bread in the house, we still choose turkey and chicken over other delicious protein options. But slowly–a little at a time–infrequent treats were back. Dinners and brunch out, once maybe three times a week. Lindt sea salt chocolate squares after every (ok most) meal, ice cream was a staple over the summer months. Cinnamon puffins breakfast cereal–cripes–even typing it makes me crave a bowl of it. My father used to say “everything, in moderation.” But when you are an addict, addicted to something socially acceptable or not, its hard (impossible?) to discern where moderation ends.

comeAnyway, this is just a little bit of how we got here. It’s only my side of the story. Ratchet may have other things to say, most likely much different than mine. A whole lot of little things led us to this past Monday – start over day. But the good news is, now we are here. Present in this moment, in these choices, committed to new plans. We’ll share what they are in the next few posts.

I love this Rumi quote. It sums exactly where I am. You too maybe?

Join us.

ps – This post is far from perfect. But I’ve re-written this bitch 4 times now and I just want to put it out there. Its day 4 of no sugar and it’s just not pretty right now. There you have it.


Month 1

my incentive

Rachel, a month in.

You may have gathered from my last post, but its the kind of week that it just might bear repeating: it’s been a rough week. Like I wanna dive head first into a vat of lobster & melted butter then jump out and dry off with some New York cheesecake kind of a rough week.

With regard to diet, I’m getting bored.
With regard to the workouts, I’m exhausted.
With regard to cooking and cleaning and tupperware and washing the same workout bras 3 times a week and did I mention the tupperware? This new adventure is a part time job, and the pay is my ass. But today—oh sweet baby Jesus today—you rewarded me kindly.

I’m not sure I’ve mentioned it before, this whole thing we are doing has an incentive tied to it (well outside of the obvious incentive of massive weight loss and potentially looking incredibly hot). It’s a weight loss challenge, and the winner gets trip for 2 to Paris. Today was weigh in day for the challenge.

At our first meeting with Hamish (on January 3rd) we did a “test” workout and weighed in. Both almost killed me. The workout was 20 minutes and the shame of how it went was almost unbearable. I weighed in at 238.

Today I weighed in at 224. And the shame, well, its sort of like my ass. Slowly disappearing.